'Being old is unpleasant - I feel invisible'

For some people getting older can be a blessing - and for others a burden. But however you feel, a person's age should never be a factor in how they are perceived or treated.

Yet, according to Age UK, nearly 78% of people aged over 60 believe they are ignored by society, while nearly a million over the age of 65 say they often feel alone.

One of those is 90-year-old former businessman, Colin, who lives near Stowmarket, Suffolk, and is on the brink of being moved into a care home.

He told the BBC that he felt "invisible" and that this part of his life – a life once filled with jet-setting between New York and London - was the "most unpleasant".

"This is the worst part of my life and I don't think anybody who is 90 would say different, because you can't be better than you were at 55 or 60," he said.

"When you get old, you're not part of society anymore. I sometimes cannot hear what people are saying and so I don't become part of the conversation, I can't join in.

"My actual thinking now is that I'm at the end of my life, and that's fair enough."

According to data measured between 2022 and 2024 by the Office for National Statistics (ONS) the average life expectancy for men is 79 years and 83 for women.

When compared to the average age at which people died between 1980 and 1982, that's an increase of about nine years for men and seven for women.

While we may be living longer than ever before, the ONS recently projected that deaths would outnumber births in the UK every year from 2026.

A depressing thought for some? It is music to the ears of Colin.

"The problem is that we are all living too long and people shouldn't live this long," he added.

"There is now a bigger percentage of the population that is growing older and I don't think we were meant to – it's just not nice.

"It is unpleasant and society does not know how to cope with [people living for longer]."

While these days Colin struggles to be independent, managing only really to get in and out of bed on his own, he once lived an exciting and fast-paced lifestyle.

He travelled all over the world for work, frequently flying on Concorde from London to New York to seal business deals before hopping on a flight back home.

"It was a great, great life but now it's totally different," he admits.

"I definitely miss it, enormously, and I'd love to live those 35 years between 1955 and 1990 again – I would go back to that any time."

Colin is currently being cared for by his daughter, Catherine Carlton, 58, who recently returned to Suffolk to be with him after seven years of travelling the world in a converted lorry.

The former teacher and her husband Chris, 56, spent 18 months kitting out the vehicle – named Florry the Lorry – in Bury St Edmunds, before hitting the road.

They decided to embrace a newfound freedom after their children had grown up and they opted to turn their backs on life in London.

But since returning, Catherine says she has been left shocked by how her father is treated because of his age.

"No one talks to him - if I take him out, people talk to me, and he's found that really hard," she told the BBC.

"[Elderly people have] got a life, they've got a history, they've done a lot, there's a lot to be learn from them - it just feels quite sad, actually.

"But people don't respect the elderly."

Caroline Abrahams, charity director at Age UK, said older people feeling the way that Colin does was "truly awful" but "more common than most people realise".

"Words such as 'overlooked', 'underestimated' and 'forgotten' are often heard from older people who call into our national services," she said.

"Given this, it's no wonder that nearly half of people aged 50-65 (46%) fear getting old, with over half (56%) worrying about people assuming they're less capable.

"Yet our older generation make such a large contribution to society, as contributors across all walks of life – they bring the wisdom of experience to everything they do.

"We all share the responsibility of changing how we age."

The way the older generation is treated can also have a detrimental impact on their health – both physical and mental.

Loneliness, for example, is linked with a 29% increase in the risk of incident coronary heart disease and a 32% increase in the risk of stroke.

Nine in 10 older people who are often lonely, meanwhile, are also unhappy or depressed, according to Age UK.

Ezra Hewing, head of education at Suffolk Mind, said: "Whatever stage we are at in life, meeting emotional needs for community, emotional connection, to feel valued and that life has meaning and purpose, is essential for our mental health.

"Our increasingly fragmented society risks isolating people in the later stages of life but also losing opportunity to learn from their life experiences and to value what it is they have to pass on."

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