Former Premier League star opens up about loss to help others

A former Premier League footballer whose daughter died from meningococcal septicaemia have said they hope that by speaking out about their loss they can help others in the same situation.

Dean Holden and Danielle Nicholls lost their daughter Cici, aged 17 months, after she contracted meningococcal septicaemia while they were on holiday in Lanzarote in May 2012.

Nicholls said it was important for the couple to talk openly about their "devastating" loss as they launch their new YouTube reality series charting their family life "warts and all".

The mum-of-five told BBC Breakfast that her other four children "have saved my life" and "are my happiness and... my sunshine".

She said the family used humour as a way to help them to cope with their loss and "I think that that's how you have to move forward", adding that "you have to see the brighter side (of life)".

She said: "I didn't want the kids to think life was great and then our sister died, and life was horrible and it's so difficult because there is such sadness."

"I go to a lot of support groups for parents who have lost children and the thing that comes up is that you are so heartbroken, it's so devastating, just keeping a marriage together but trying to bring some happiness and love into a family as well, it is difficult," she added.

Holden, who is assistant manager at Hull City FC and a former defender at clubs including Bolton Wanderers, Oldham and Peterborough, said they felt it was important to talk openly about their loss.

"We are inviting the world into our home but we think we've got a powerful story to tell," he said.

The TV and radio presenter said it was "a story of tragedy" but "we're now out the other side and it's a story of hope, hopefully and inspiration".

Nicholls said they wanted to show their real life through the series - called Holden It Together - and that "it can be fun, warts and all - it's always with love".

Their oldest son Joey said that when Cici died it was "so horrific as you can imagine but the way that these two [his parents] especially have led the family through that period and the way that we all come together now, it's really really inspirational".

"It gives me and, I think, these three [his siblings] so much hope for growing up and having your own kids and seeing how the whole family has got through the other side," he added.

The couple have previously said they had to find many ways to deal with their devastating loss, including becoming ambassadors for the Meningitis Now charity.

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