I don't know what came over me the other day, but I must have been delirious or something because whilst I was doing a spot of spring cleaning (yes you heard right, cleaning!), I spotted my rollerblades underneath a load of stuff under the bed.

So I dusted them off and decided that the streets of Chorlton was not the best place for me to disgrace myself, least a friend or acquaintance (even) should spot me making a damn fool of myself.

getting the gear on

On the appointed dreaded day, me and da kids decided to give em a whirl at a skate park. I was expecting mainly women and children there because we thought it was a play park.

But 'Oh no!' - there were loads of grown men, tweenage/teenage boys and three gals on skateboards practising their Tony Hawk moves who had as much testosterone flowing as any of the male species in the vicinity - and believe me the smell of testosterone was very strong in the air (then again, it could have been the smell of fear!).

Bones of Stockport is an extreme sports city and the place to be (so the kids told me). Aggressive skating, boarding and BMX bikes are all allowed here. In my two hours there, I found myself wondering how anybody managed to exit the place without breaking every single bone in their body - then again maybe that's why it is called Bones. Visit the Bones website >>>

Bones of Stockport

Of the three rooms, I spent most of my time in the beginner's room and stayed well away from the street and ramps room downstairs with its impressive 11 inch vert, 6 inch mini driveway and a 3'/8' figure bowl.

This is where most of the action is. Dudes on their BMXs and skate boarders were catching some serious air and doing all types of imaginable flips - kick, heel, varial, fronts & back, 180s to 360s (I was told). I was impressed but I wasn't about to try anything 'cos my Jimmy Choos would be idle for a long time if I broke anything.

As it was I had already had a bad fall and only woke up to the strong smell of coffee, after which I decided to keep it real - I was never going to be Fabiola da Silva.

I thoroughly enjoyed myself, but the £4 quid I'd paid for the two hour session was spent checking out the latest skating gear as opposed to trying any tricks.