Hurrah! Snog Marry Avoid? is back on Monday 14th May at 10.30pm and awesomely enough for yours truly, they’ve let me present it! I’ve had a brilliant time filming the show and even if I do say so myself, I think it’s a real corker of a series with some jaw-droppingly outrageous contributors.

One of the most memorable of this series has to be Kate from Manchester, whose pre-makeunder style is unlike anything I have ever seen in my life. And I’m from Essex so I’ve seen A LOT. Talking to her was like talking to a human totem pole and an animal sacrifice all in one. And she collects her pubes in a jar. Need I say more.

Kate from Manchester

Then there is Hannah from Newport. The phrase ‘she is the colour of mahogany’ has been bandied about many a time on this show, but seriously, SHE IS THE COLOUR OF MAHOGANY. It was like talking to the wardrobe from ‘Beauty and The Beast’ but with longer nails and a Welsh accent. Wait ‘til you see her makeunder; it’s one of the most drastic changes I have ever seen on the show.

The makeunder team who work with the contributors are fab. The transformations they’ve created have been startling, and for someone like me, who once used red food colouring as instant hair dye, it’s been a real education. I’ve learnt so much from them, like heated rollers are not in fact for blue-rinse grannies, but are actually a super easy way to create curls that can survive even the heartiest Manchester rain shower.

I’ve also learnt that toothpaste is a great way to get rid of fake tan tide marks. It certainly sounds better than scrubbing your streaky bits with a towel creating strange friction burns leading to an awkward conversation with your mum... apparently...

This series also sees me and POD hit the streets of the UK, travelling all round Britain, from Cardiff to Chelmsford, Newcastle to Liverpool on the first ever ‘Snog Marry Avoid?’ roadshow.

While we were on the road, POD challenged me to try out a few of her worst fakery crimes, like cat claw nails, Rapunzel hair extensions and even a bit of a lip enhancement  along the way (think Pete Burns in a frock with an Essex accent...)

This basically means that thanks to POD, in every episode there is an ‘Ellie walking round looking like a tit’ section which is usually something I save exclusively for 2am on a Friday night near a kebab shop.

Some of the looks POD made me try I really hated, like getting ‘Scousebrows’ in Liverpool. I looked like a child had been let loose on my face with a marker pen and a grudge. Some of the Scouse girls get away with it beautifully... I am not one of those girls...

Ellie's Dolly Parton/Cher Lloyd blow-dry!

Then there were the things I tried out that I liked a little bit too much. Just wait till you see my hugely voluminous Geordie blowdry – I can only describe the result as a cross between a young Dolly Parton and an old Cher Lloyd. It was magnificent and quite possibly the best 30 minutes of my life, until POD made me brush it out of course... if ever there was a time to use a sad emoticon, this is it :o(

Anywho, I’ve had an absolute blast making the show, and I hope you all approve of Snog’s very own mini-make over! Happy PODing!

Snog, Marry Avoid returns on Monday 14th May at 10.30pm

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